Between our SF and NY offices, we have some of the funniest, smartest and most personable dogs we’ve ever shared a string cheese with. If man wanted a best friend, he wouldn’t have to look further than the Dogs of Mekanism.
In honor of Take Your Dog To Work Day – a day we swear we didn’t make up – we’re doing something a little different: We’re having a sit down conversation with our dogs.
Welcome, Mabel from Mekanism SF, friend of our friend Julie. By all accounts, Mabel is a very SPECIAL dog. Notice which word is emphasized.
WHY ARE YOU CALLED MABEL? a) I intentionally eat dinner SUPER early, so I poop before I go to bed; b) I’m half blind; c) young strange men make me nervous; d) I get SUPER grumpy, when I’m tired; and e) I have big watery eyes.
DO YOU LIKE BEING BATHED & PRIMPED? HELL. FUCKING. NO.
EVER PEED ON SOMETHING JUST TO BE BAD? I’m not a monster.
HUMAN JOB: I’m not really a people person. And my brain is small…sooooooo…
Odette is a beautiful dachshund who accompanies Melissa to Mekanism NY. After a long talk about fashion and puppy celebrities, we got down to business.
WHY ARE YOU CALLED ODETTE? Because my mommy is an ex-ballet dancer (and Francophile), Odette is the name of the good swan in Swan Lake.
MOST FAMOUS BUTT YOU’VE SNIFFED: I have been approached by both Uma Thurman and Bernadette Peters, although I did not sniff their butts. I have manners, after all.
COSTUMES? I only have a stupid shark costume my parents got me. It is incredibly embarrassing. Why can’t they find something more civilized?
Gwyneth is the costar of Meredith’s blog – Meredith and the New Yorkie. But, she’s found time to make occasional appearances at Mekanism SF. We caught up with her between photo shoots.
WHY ARE YOU CALLED GWYNETH? My mom liked the idea of big names for little dogs, and since I’m a Yorkie, she went with one of the more popular names from that part of the UK. It has absolutely nothing to do with Gwyneth Paltrow. I think she might actually be named after me.
BEST SNACK: There is nothing I won’t do for shredded cheese. I prefer the Mexican blend from Trader Joe’s.
DO YOU LIKE THE BATH? Absolutely not. Mom thinks because she gives me a blow dry with her fancy hair dryer that it’s cute to call it a “spa day,” but let’s just call it the BS it truly is.
DO YOU LIKE DRESSING UP? If you had a natural fur coat, would you want to cover it with something made of 100% polyester? My mom made me a piñata costume for halloween last year, complete with a ridiculous hat. Humiliating.
PET PEEVES: Funny you should phrase it that way. I hate having to wait until my mom gets out of bed in the morning to pee.
Penny can only be described as a fluffy brown ball of energy that lovingly follows around Jeremy at Mekanism NY. But even Penny admits, there’s such thing as too much energy. After she spent 2 hours destroying a towel, she opened up about herself.
WHY ARE YOU CALLED PENNY? My dog-rents love old lady names and when they realized that if my name was Penelope that I’d be Penny Pinches, it was set.
BEST “BAD DOG” MOMENT: I’m in trouble all day everyday. I bark at everything. Everyone. Orange cones. Deliverymen. Mekanism employees. I destroy any and every object around me.
MOST FAMOUS BUTT YOU’VE SNIFFED: Parker Posey’s dog’s butt on 17th Street. I tried to sniff her butt too, but she’s too tall.
DOWNSIDE OF BEING A DOG: SoHo tourists occasionally step on me, no one can understand me, and I can’t go to happy hour.
ARE YOU A GOOD GIRL? Meh.
Lulu is the face at the front desk of Mekanism SF alongside her human, Kara. Lulu knows she’s a pretty lady-dog, and she will do anything for a snack, including answering questions about herself.
BEST “BAD GIRL” MOMENT: One time, my human left an open bag of sour gummy worms on the couch. I ate the entire bag in two minutes, and when she came home, I felt guilty… or maybe just sick. Anyway, I puked a rainbow. She appreciated it. Probably.
BEST SNACK: Pizza crust, beef jerky, petrodex. I have a stash of pizza crust under my human’s bed.
BEST GIFT YOU’VE RECEIVED: Six meatballs and the skin of the Christmas chicken.
HUMAN JOB: I think I would be a model. From what I’ve seen, all they do is lay around, and they have other humans petting them all the time.
Eva is our least-legged office dog, but we’re not sure she knows it. She’s twelve years young, and finally starting not to act like a puppy.
WHY ARE YOU CALLED EVA? Talk about irony. I got it while I was in County (Animal Control). I think it’s short for “Eva Destruction.”
PET PEEVES: Skateboards, cats, UPS drivers, submissive Chihuahuas, being left at home while the humans leave.
COSTUMES?: YES! Nothing is embarrassing. I make shit look good.
BEST TOY: Tennis balls. I’ve been called “Ball Obsessed.” But, I swear I could quit anytime.
HUMAN JOB: I would definitely like to try teaching cats to swim.
Dexter has been looking forward to joining Jessica and the team at Mekanism SF for some time. Everyone had heard so much about Dexter before he arrived, that his first day felt like a reunion. Still, we had some questions…
BEST “BAD BOY” MOMENT: One time, I climbed up on to the counter and licked all the icing off the sides of a cake that Jess’s Mom had baked. She didn’t realize I’d done it until she was halfway through her second piece.
FAVORITE SNACK: Popcorn. It has like, almost no calories.
PET PEEVES: I get emotional when shiny things (mirrors, phones, etc.) reflect light onto walls. WHAT ARE YOU, SPIRIT, AND WHY DO YOU TORMENT ME?
HUMAN JOB: Probably some sort of hybrid actor/dancer/martial artist. Like Steven Segal with a beautiful singing voice.
Mabel is the aptly named companion of Sean at Mekanism NY. A beautiful schnauzer, Mabel looks wiser than the Norse god Odin and has eyebrows that make Scorsese’s look like they’ve been threaded. After analyzing our childhood and helping us understand the root of our intimacy issues, we had some light conversation.
WHY ARE YOU CALLED MABEL? Let’s be frank. I look like an old man and have the name of an old lady.
BEST BAD BITCH MOMENT: Hm… profanity is the linguistic crutch of the inarticulate. To answer your question, I once chewed on a remote control for the whole day while my humans were at work. They cared more than I did.
FAVORITE TOY: Squeaky Hedgehog or Green Squeaky Bone. It really depends on my mood.
BATHE MUCH?: I get bathed once every 1-2 weeks and it seems to be working out well for me.